VT: A Larryboy Movie
by Ek01
Summary: The hilariously epic origins of our purple, plunger-headed hero. Featuring the music of Prince.
1. Allusions&songs

Allusions:

This story greatly references the past and current Batman mythology in a number of ways.

For instance, the "Punchline" is a parody of the Joker (with a bit of Prince (being since the artist contributed to the soundtrack for Batman (1989)), along with assistant "Charli Kins" (Harley Quinn). Also,"Police Commish Jimbo" is a parody of Commissioner James Gordon.

The way the Punchline kisses is an allusion to the Bugs Bunny "Looney Tunes" cartoons.

The "Herbicide Squad" is an obvious parody of the Suicide Squad.

The quote, "He's more than meets the eye." Is an allusion to the Transformers series of toys.

Note:

Reipan" is "Napier" spelled backwards.

Songs:

I would die 4 U

(Prince)

Kiss

(Prince, performed

by the Punchline)

Trust

(Prince, from the Batman 1989 soundtrack)

Partyman

(Prince, from the Batman 1989

soundtrack)

Purple Rain

(Prince)


	2. The Origin

\--

Bumblyberg, 1961

Somewhere near Crime Alley...

It is very late at night, and very dark...

(Well, Bumblyberg's dark in the first place, but you get the picture.)

We open near the Proboscis Theatre.

Lots of people exit, having enjoyed the movie. One such family leaves. This is no ordinary family, no, they are none other than Bumblyberg's richest family, the

Cukes.

Mrs. Cuke wears a lovely dark blue dress with a string of pearls. Her hair is red and wavy in contrast to Mr. Cuke's jet-black locks. Mr. Cuke wears a handsome tuxedo matching the couple's only son, Lawrence Cuke. Lawrence is a cute little thing of five and a half years, very excitable and kind.

"Gee mom! Pop!" Exclaimed the boy. "That was the best one yet! Thanks so much for taking me!"

"Why certainly, my boy." Says Mr.

Cuke. "Anything for you."

The Cukes walk down the street, Lawrence telling her about his favorite scenes.

"Dear," says Mrs. Cuke to her husband. "The next street is rather crowded. Shall we take that shortcut?"

Mr. Cuke stares down the desolate alley. He seems a bit uneasy.

"Um, alright, dear." He gulps. "We do have our life insurance."

The three cucumbers walk down the alley, Lawrence very close to his parents. A cat yowls in the distance. A gun cocks, and the family stops in

front of a bunch of robbers.

"Ey beautiful.." says one of them.

"Hand ovah them poils or the kid gets it!"

"No, no no!!" Exclaims another voice. "Ya got it all wrong!"

"Ya don't go for the POILS, stupid, ya go for the MONEY!! THE MONEYYYY!!" The lead shakes

his associate wildly.

Mr. and Mrs. Cuke look at each other. The lead clears his throat.

"Ahem, terribly sorry--my compatriot is rather stupid at the

moment, so I'll just say you this; have you ever Danced with the Devil in the pale moonlight?"

The Cukes do not answer.

"Lawrence..." whispers Mrs. Cuke to his son.

"...run!"

Lawrence quickly obeys. He runs and runs and does not stop until he is miles away from the alley, and near the police station. Despite the fact he is very far from his parents, he can still hear the loud (*"BOOM!!"*) echoing in his ear.

Lawrence is so saddened he cannot even speak. He does not talk for the next few hours. Later, at the police station, he sits there, worrying about his poor parents. Then, a hand wraps around him.

"Don't be sad, Master Lawrence." Says the upper-crust English lilt of

Alfred, the family butler. "In their absence I will raise you. I will teach you everything I know, how to fight, how to do advanced science and

mathematics, how to, well, live."


	3. Rocky-Style Montage

"I'm not a

woman

I'm not a man

I am something

that you'll never

understand.."

Larry tries to chop a block of wood. As he gives his hardest swipe, he

nearly breaks his non-existent hand.

Alfred sighs.

"We've got a long way to go, Master." He says.

"I'm not your

lover

I'm not your friend

I am something

that you'll never

comprehend.."

Larry is sitting down at a mahogany desk. He is much older now, and is

working on college worksheets. Alfred smiles.

"No, Master Lawrence." He says. "It's like this."

The asparagus begins to tutor the cucumber.

"'Cause you, I

would die for you,

yeah

Darling if you

want me to

You, I would die

for you.."

Larry grunts as he lifts the enormous weights. He successfully lifts the first, then another, then the same 50-pound weight with Alfred.

"Well done, Master Lawrence." Says Alfred as he looks down at his surrogate son.

"'Cause you, I

would die for you,

yeah

Darling if you

want me to

You, I would die

for you.."

Finally, Larry approaches the same block of wood he'd failed to chop previously when he was much younger. With the swipe of a non-existent hand, he chopped it

perfectly in half. He chopped another block, then another and another. He chopped five more,

and then twelve stacked on top of each other.

"Most impressive, Master Lawrence." Said Alfred, smiling.


	4. 30 years later

\--

It is evening. Lawrence sits in his armchair, contemplating.

"I am skilled in over thirty forms of self defense, including tae-kwon-do, and jiu-jitsu."

"I have ten degrees in Harvard, Juliard, and Princeton for outstanding achievements in

mathematics, science, and athletics.."

Lawrence turns around. He gazes longingly at the family photos upon

the huge walls.

"And yet, I feel as though something is missing. Dad...Dad and mom, Mom and Dad...I could have saved them. Dad always said that the criminals of the world were nothing more than a...a superstitious,

cowardly LOT!!"

"If I am to stop them, LORD ALMIGHTY GIVE ME A SIGN!!" Larry cries to the heavens.

Suddenly, through his window flies something.

Gadzooks.

A BAT!

A great big black bat flies through the window.

"It is an omen!" Lawrence exclaims. "An omen for me to become a hero, that way no one else's relatives will be brutally murdered like mine!"

"I shall become a hero, not just any hero. No..."

Lawrence begins to form a helmet belonging to one of the TV heroes of his childhood, and places plungers on the sides of them.

"I AM REDEMPTION!!"

"I AM JUSTICE!!"

"I AM PART OF THE ADULT

WORLD AND A CHILDISH WORLD, BOTH A MAN AND A BOY!!"

"I...AM...THAT...HERO!! AND THEY WILL CALL ME...LLLLLLLLLARRY BOYY!!!"

"CUE LIGHTNING!"

A bolt strikes across the window as Lawrence stands boldly on top of the desk, holding his newly-

formed helmet with plunger-ears.

Alfred peeks out from behind him.

"...wouldn't you rather have that

bat as your symbol?"

"Naah." Lawrence shrugs. "It'd be a major lawsuit I can tell you that."


	5. No Laughin’ Matter

Meanwhile, a few miles away from Larry's revelation, another story is taking place.

The story of a regular, yet slightly

troubled middle-working class

family. Jack Reipan, the patriarch of the family, is a scallion who is a stand-up comedian trying to support his pregnant wife. One day, he is walking back home, when someone approaches him.

"Hey buddy." He says. "You look like

a guy who's down on his luck. You wanna come with us?"

"Uh, no.." Jack sighs. "My wife's...uh...expecting me. Come to

think of it, she's also...er...expecting." Jack inhales his stomach so as to depict pregnancy.

"Y'know."

"Aw man! Leave the little woman at

home for once why don't ya?"

Jack leaves. The man rubs his non-existent hands together and grins.

"You could get a lot

of moneyyy..."

Jack stops in his tracks with a

(*screech!*) and quickly returns.

"WELL sign me up!"

\--

"This is so wrong." Laments Jack as

he enters wearing a red hood and

tuxedo.

"Come on!" Says a thug. "Y'said ya wanted the money—this is how you'll get it!"

"Oh sure." Jack sarcastically comments. "By that you mean breaking into this chemical factory and stealing some priceless form of

METH?! Yeah, if you wanna do it the

easy way."

"OKAY SMART GUY!" The lead thug points his gun at him. "IF YA THINK YOU'RE SO TOUGH.."

The guy leads Jack across the hall, up a flight of stairs, directly above a large drop. At the bottom, are hundreds of chemical vats filled with various rainbow-like colors.

"...YOU CAN TAKE A DIP!"

"Wait! Wait what're you doin?" Jack

tries to remove the hood, but to no avail. Suddenly, he freezes, horrified.

Behind him, is a rather tall figure with bat...no, plunger-like ears. Jack cannot really make out the

appearance of the man, but judging

how the other bad guy left him so

quickly, this dude was scary. Jack tries to calm down. He looks at the figure, then at the chemicals. Back and forth he does this, until he cracks.

"Buh-bye!" Is all he says.

Jack leaps off the balcony, screaming while falling rapidly, until...

KER-SPLAAASH!!*

Jack was submerged, deep within the waters.

What he didn't know, was that they would both figuratively and literally change him forever...

\--

Police cars from all across Bumblyberg show up at the scene of the crime. At the front of the vehicles is the lead car, belonging to a zucchini. This zucchini in particular is the Bumblyberg Police Commish Jimbo.

He grabs a megaphone, drinks a small paper cup of water, then turns

it on.

"THIS IS POLICE COMMISH JIMBO! WE HAVE YOU SURROUNDED!! COME ON OUT WITH YOUR NON-

EXISTENT HANDS UP, OR YOU'VE

FORCED US TO USE FORCE!"

Everyone waits.

Then, slowly, the sounds of laughter are heard. The Commish is not

pleased.

"HEY QUIT THAT!!" He exclaims into the megaphone yet again. "THIS IS NO LAUGHING MATTER!!"

"Oh..." says a voice from afar. "But my dear Commish..."

Footsteps approach.

Now the Commish is terrified. It

sounds just like someone he used to know, but the appearance is vastly different. A scallion struts out in front of the entire police force, only thing is that his skin is completely white, his pompadour-like hair is bright green, and he has a huge grin. The scallion also wears a purple suit and coattails with a matching boater hat. A spotlight comes on him as he struts out and sings;

"You don't have

to be beautiful...

To turn me

on..."

"Tell me he isn't.." says a police officer.

"I just need

your body baby..

From dusk till

dawn..."

"He is, Murray. We got us a songbird." Replies the Commish. "FIRE AT WILL!!" The Commish tells his officers.

The scallion grabs a rubber chicken and begins to deflect the bullets.

He launches it off, it happens to

knock a water tower over with a

"KA-BOOOOM!!*

"You don't

need experience

To turn me out

You just leave it

all up to me

I'm gonna show

you what it's all

about.."

The scallion grasped a female officer and twirled her around. Another male officer held a gun at the scallion, but the spinning female knocked him out. The scallion tossed a couple of bombs shaped as clown faces at everyone, they exploded in a strange green gas

in the shape of a smile, then spread, causing most of the officers to uncontrollably laugh.

"You don't have

to be rich

To be my girl

You don't have to

be cool

To rule my world

Ain't no particular

sign I'm more

compatible with

I just want your

extra time and

your

[Muah muah

muah muah

muah] Kiss."

With each muah, five police officers had immensely messy red stained lips. Someone tossed a guitar shaped like a strange symbol to

the scallion, and he began shredding somethin' funky! A piano was pushed out of nowhere,

some men associated with the scallion began spinning him around while he shredded (a few times behind his back and with his tongue), while at the same time

shooting at the police cars, disabling them. He stopped.

"Women not

girls,

Rule my world

I said they rule my

world Act your age,

mama (Not your

shoe size)

Not your shoe

size

Maybe we could

do the twirl

You don't have to

watch Dynasty

To have an

attitude

You just leave it

all up to me

My love will be

your food

Yeah..."

The scallion grabbed a cream pie from his coat and splattered it on the Commish's face. He placed a cherry on the zucchini's nose.

"You don't have

to be rich

To be my girl

You don't have to

be cool

To rule my world

Ain't no particular

sign I'm more

compatible with

I just want your extra time and

your...

Kiss."

Commish Jimbo dives after the scallion who ducks out of the way. He tries to punch him, but it is to no avail. The scallion yanks out a gun and pulls the trigger, sending a huge punching glove directly at Jimbo's face. Jimbo shakes his head, coming to consciousness.

"Jack?" He says, dazed. "Ol' college buddy, is that you?"

"Jack..." the scallion snickers. "There is no Jack, my friend. He's

long-gone...splattered into oblivion n like the chicken that crossed the road, like a.." he quickly grabs a remaining dollop of banana cream on the Commish's face and licks it. "Like a pie to the face.."

"What?"

"Don't you get it, man?! Forget Jack..." The scallion maliciously laughs long and hard.

"...you can call me the Punchline, bub."

(Cue Tocata en Fugue in D Minor)


	6. Some slightly offensive Mexican carnival

The familiar sticky noise of a plunger hits a building, then another as Larry swings across the city with

his helmet. Who knew that a simple

household object could make an excellent grappling hook? Larry reaches the top of a large building in which he notices the scene that just happened.

"Hmm..." He contemplates a moment. "This character looks a tiny bit familiar..."

Lightning strikes as the scallion reveals his name. Larry stands back. This guy means business, despite his non-serious clown persona. The scallion and a couple other men drive off. Upon activating his suction-cup hearing aid, Larry hears that he intends on meeting

with someone to take over the city!

"Not on my watch ya don't..."

\--

\--

\--

\--

\--

The lair of a villain is always, absolutely dark and scary-looking.

It is most likely going to be in an

abandoned warehouse or in the sewage system. For Punchline, this was mostly the case, except said warehouse lair was hastily assembled; painted bright sunflower-yellow, with a large tv and fainting chair.

The scallion-turned criminal lounged upon the chair, laughing and crudely drawing the various "evil plans" he would execute.

Suddenly, the door opened, and a tall, female asparagus on roller skates enters. In one non-existent arm, she carries a white purse, in

another, a large, gray-colored pet

cage.

"Hiii!!" She pipes.

"Yes, yes...I know, but I don't want any thin mints, dearie." Punchline

went back to coloring. "Go on, tell the Brownies or the Dandelions or

whatever your troop name is tha--"

"I'm not a Girl Scout ya silly!" The asparagus laughs. "My name's Charli! Charli Kin--remember that doc at Larkham that used ta interview you every third Tuesday of the month?"

"Uh.."

"I was in the Herbicide Squad fer 30 years?"

"Oh yeeeaaahh!!" Punchline claps his non-existent hands together and smiles. "How are ya, Charli? Say, what's that in the cage?"

"I'll show ya!" Charli unhooks the cage door and waits.

A large, dusty gray dog with black

spots emerges from the cage. This

dog has long, black, bristle-like hairs on its back and insanely sharp

claws. It looks at Punchline and

makes a "ye!ye!ye!ye!" noise, much

like a person's laughter.

"Is that a--"

"Male, spotted hyena? Native to the plains of South Africa?" Charli

responds. "Ex-act-ay-mundo! This

feller right here is Chuckles, however I like to call him Chuck."

Punchline smiles and allows Chuck to jump on him and lick his face.

"He's gorgeous!" Exclaims the scallion, stroking the hyena's fur.

"So, what's this I hear bout' you wanting to take over Bumblyberg?" Asks Charli.

"Absolutely no reason at all!" Exclaims Punchline. "This is just cause so many people need a good laugh!"

Charli smiles.

"My dear.." Punchline stands up. "We are gonna have to go BIG if we're gonna take over this city and then the world! That's why I have a

brilliant idea!"

Punchline slams a crude drawing on the table. It's a strange slightly Mexican-themed carnival-like place

next to a Crayola sketch of he and

Charli wearing sombreros and day

of the dead outfits.

"It's a carnival made specifically for the upcoming 900th anniversary

of Bumblyberg. It's actually gonna be where I spray my laughing gas all over em' at midnight. As for

the title, I'm thinkin' 'El Punchline-ito's Carnival y Fiesta de los tacos'!"

"That's POIFECT!" Exclaims Charli. "I love the whole Mexican thing, but

ya might wanna change the name. Sounds a liiittle too racist."

"Okay. I'll change it." Punchline claps his non-existent hands together. "Now let's get to work!"


	7. Detective work

Lawrence sits at a table, analyzing various clues. He writes down a few

notes and grabs some almonds

from a snack bowl.

Alfred appears, dusting a few busts and holding a green bottle with

some strange liquid.

"How is the detective work coming, Master Lawrence?" Asked he.

"Alfred...you can call me Larry, if that's alright." Said Larry.

"I have something that might aid you in apprehending this criminal."

Alfred placed the bottle on the table.

"...olive oil?" Said Larry.

"Yes...olive oil." Said Alfred. "Back in England, during the Great War, my father used this extra virgin oil to

not only free himself from a Nazi prisoner-of-war camp, but to make

only the finest in culinary delights. He said, "Son, this olive oil might

seem like a common household bottle, but if you put your mind to it, it can be the most useful thing ever. Just like you, my boy." He is long-gone, so now I am passing it to you, my adoptive son." Alfred smiled

and handed Larry the olive oil.

Larry didn't know whether to be glad or confused at his surrogate father's gift. Nonetheless, he thanked him, placed the bottle into his utility belt, and went down into his newly-constructed Larry-Cave.

The inhabitants, a large colony of bats, didn't mind at all that he was storing some of his superhero articles. Larry reaches his superhero vehicle, the Larry-mobile,

and enters.

"Lets see..." Larry presses some

knobs. "Atomic batteries to power, turbines to speed..."

Within seconds, the Larrymobile zooms out of the cave and into the city, where dusk breaks. He parks the vehicle and looks around. Practically the whole town is lining

up for something, it appears. As the line moves closer, it appears to be

some kind of amusement park/circus/carnival type place.

"Sorry, ma'am." Says a security guard in overly happy clown

facepaint to a woman with a small dog in her purse. "No dogs allowed. I'll have to use my K-9 unit unless you get rid of that mongrel."

The woman raises an eyebrow. It seems redundant, considering the

security guard himself has an attack dog...er, hyena? The tiny

Shih-tzu cowers and whimpers in

fear at the sight of the hyena. Larry

decides to move in front while no-one is looking.

"Trust, who do

ya?

Trust, what makes

you a real lover?

Trust, I put this

question to ya

Cause I want you

to be with me.."

Neon lights flickered. The sounds of people screaming on rollercoasters could be heard.

Above game stands were hundreds of (actually quite adorable) stuffed bears as prizes that either looked like Punchline or Charli. There was even a small one resembling that hyena.

"StEEEEEEPPPP RIGHT UP AN DON'T BE SHY KIDS!" Came a loud voice from the PA.Larry gritted his teeth. He recognized that voice.

"Him..." he grunted.

Nonetheless Larry paid his entrance fee and walked through the entrance; a giant, stupid-looking

pasty clown face with a wide gaping mouth.

"WEEEELCOME TO THE PUNCHLINE'S BIG FAT AWESOME CARNIVAL OF FUN!! IT'S MY GIFT TO YOU FOR BUMBLYBERG'S 900TH ANNIVERSARY!! (¡Se habla español!)"

Within the area, are thousands more arcade games and sideshow attractions, some labeled according to the Mexican theme in poor Spanish, such as "El Petting Zoo-o" or "El Lady Gordo".

"Love, you

cannot imagine

How much I want

to give to you

Hot, I get so

excited

Just thinkin' about

all we could do

Dig it now.."

Cuke enters along with various others. He looks to the side and notices the Commish with a few other officers talking and drinking margaritas.

The Commish grabs a balloon and inhales the helium.

"You have the right to remain silent!" He squeaks.

Everyone laughs hard, including the Commish.

"How oblivious they are to all this." Larry says to himself. "The bad guy's right under their noses!"

"Another world

awaits us

Another power to

see

Close, don't worry

about nobody else

From now on

you'll be here with

me Trust, who do ya?

Trust, what makes

you a real lover?

Trust, I put this

question to ya

Cause I want you

to be with

me..."

Punchline and Charli are visible on

a TV screen, the scallion shredding

his guitar in front of thousands of Bumblyberg citizens.

"If you ever wanna come up and see me sometime..." Punchline smirks. "Survive--er, get through all four rooms of my funhouse!"

Larry grimaces.

Yet, he follows the signs leading to the enormous funhouse amidst the Mexican-themed petting zoo.

"Perfect..." says Larry, sarcastically as he changes into his purple and yellow Larryboy outfit.

"Alfred?" He says on his comlink.

"I'm gonna go through a whole

lotta weird, so please try not to interrupt me."

Larry enters the funhouse and takes a deep breath.


	8. Funhouse Follies

"All hail, the

new king in town

Young and old,

gather 'round

(yeah)

Black and white,

red and green

(funky)

The funkiest man

you've ever

seen.."

The first room Larry enters is a hall of mirrors. Entrapped betwixt various horrific and hilarious reflections, he must try and break

through.

"Tell you what

his name is

Partyman,

partyman

Rock a party like

nobody can

Rules and

regulations, no

place in his nation

Partyman, partyman!"

With every mirror he smashes, an exit is revealed, leading to more mirrors and wildly sickening coloring everywhere. In one

reflection, he is a woman. In another reflection, he is a child. In some more reflections he is very tall, very short, an elderly man, a dog, even someone entirely different.

"Party people,

say it now, yeah,

yeah, yeah, yeah!

Somebody holler

if you want to

party

("Ladies and

gentlemen, no

pictures,

please!")"

Finally, Larry reaches the end of the mirror hall. He opens the door to

the next room.

————————

The second room is very large and colorful.

Thousands of gigantic cages are in front of Larry. He looks in one of them, the cage opens, revealing an

enormous figure, its tiny eyes and huge tusks.

""Get it up, oh

yeah

Partyman,

partyman

Get it up, get it

up.."

"Come on out, Peanut!" Says Punchline's voice from the intercom.

"Peanut", an enormous elephant emerges.

"It's playtime! Ooh! Let's bring your friends!"

Another five doors open. Thousands of circus elephants wearing colorful bridles approach

Larry, along with Peanut. They nearly trample him, but Larry fires his plunger at the ceiling and runs across the elephants' backs.

Larry exits the literal "elephant in the room", and leaves to the next trap.

\--

"I rock the

party, I rock the

house

I rock the whole

world, north, east

and south

In the west,

seventeen horns

blowin'.."

The third room is full of sideshow freaks; a conjoined carrot and broccoli, a leopard-patterned toga wearing strongman zucchini, a "midget apple", and a bearded leek woman attack Larry with their own weapons. Just as he is about to exit to the fourth room, a morbidly obese gourd woman sits on him. But Larry has built up his muscles over the years, making him strong enough to rival the strength of the strongman, and he slowly lifts up the fat lady and chunks her at the other four freaks. He exits to the fourth and final room.

\--

The last room is the craziest of all.

There is a human cannon set up at the first end, and if Larry were to launch himself across he'd have to go through a number of things; insanely sticky cotton candy launchers, popcorn poppers that shoot insanely hot kernels like bullets, thousands of clowns holding Gatling guns, fourteen flaming hoops with killer trapeze artists, not to mention dozens of circus lions, tigers, and bears!

(Oh my)

"Ain't nothin'

but a muffin

We gotta lotta

butter 2 go

(Y'say aye, an' I

like ya 'way, but

don't come now)

And if it break

when it bend!"

Larry looked to his right. A bucket filled with steak was placed for the animals's feeding time. He grabbed

the bucket, and after spinning it around a couple of times, threw it at the clowns and trapeze artists. The lions, tigers, and bears (oh my), after taking a while to get the scent, jumped off their pedestals, knocked over the popcorn and cotton candy launchers and attacked their human co-stars.

This gave Larry enough time to put himself in the cannon and light the fuse. Larry shot off, through all fourteen hoops, and made it to the other side.

"Giddy up

(Ride 'em boy)

Partyman,

partyman

Partyman

Partyman,

partyman.."

Larry exits the last door.

\--

At the very end of every crazy and weirdly wonderful room, there is a

door labeled "MANAGER" in crude red marker on a crude piece of lined paper. Larry opens it to find a vastly familiar shadow. He grits his teeth and pulls out a large baseball

bat.

Larry attacks it, to find said person

isn't a shadow at all--it's a mere statue. Upon inspecting it, there is another piece of line paper taped to its side.

"GONE TO GET ICE CREAM." It read. "HAHAHA--THAT'S RIGHT. -FROM PUNCHLINE."


	9. Big ol’ robot fight

Unfortunately this was correct. Punchline was not at his own theme park, rather completely outside the area!

"Purple rain,

purple rain

Purple rain, purple

rain

Purple rain, purple

rain

I only wanted to

see you

Underneath the

purple rain..."

"So, explain to me why we're here, again?" Asked Charli while she

sipped a root beer float.

"Well my dear," Punchline smiled.

"The initial plan is to send Larryboy on an immense wild goose chase, only to find out that at the exact moment where it is fifteen minutes until my laughing gas is released, I am two miles from the park sharing a nice banana split with you!"

"Oh." Replied Charli.

"It's only a matter of time now before he comes crashing through this quiet ice cream parlor and we make a run for it!" Punchline laughed.

"Honey, I know,

I know

I know times are

changing

It's time we all

reach out

For something

new, that means

you too.."

"Y'know..." Charli moved closer to Punchline. "I really enjoyed our little thing together, and I wanna work with you even when we have taken over the world."

"N'awww!" Punchline was touched. "Why is that?"

"Because sweetie, I've met a lot of bozos in my life, but none are as

crazy as I am for you." Charli leans in and kisses him.

Punchline is indifferent to this at first, but he leans in and continues to smooch.

Suddenly, (*CRASH!*), Larryboy breaks through the window.

Punchline and Charli are alarmed. The scallion pulls back from Charli, his sloppy rouge still on her face.

"Doesn't ANYONE knock anymore?!!" He yells.

"What're you planning, Punchline?" Asks Larryboy.

"I see you survived my funhouse." Punchline smirks.

"Is that all?!" Asks Larryboy.

"Believe me." Said Punchline, smirking. "This plan I have concocted, is more than meets the eye..."

Punchline presses a button on a large remote.

Miles away, the signal was intercepted by the giant robot moving the tilt-a-whirl. The tilt-a-whirl robot's eyes turn red.

Slowly, it stood up until its giant legs and arms were revealed. It flung all the riders off, and began trekking to Punchline.

Meanwhile, back at the ice cream parlor, Larry was still beating

Punchline, despite the many tables he hid underneath. Charli simply enjoyed her root beer and played on her Gameboy.

(*BOOM...BOOM...BOOM...*)

Suddenly, Punchline's half-melted banana split started to rumble. Charli looks outside the window and gasps.

"Uh...sugarplum?" She said,

nervous.

"Yeah, what?!" Said

Punchline.

"Our...ride..is here." Everyone looks as the robot is clearly visible. It walks closer into the parking lot, smashing cars one by one and setting off their alarms.

"Wonderful!" Punchline chirps,

smiling with his (slightly broken and bloody) Dorito-like teeth. He socks Larryboy into a corner and exits the restaurant where the robot's hand awaits.

"Come along, Charli!" He calls. Charli squeals and jumps into the

robot's hand. The hand pushes them into a compartment within the head of the robot.

Within the compartment, is a large motion-capture area, to the left, is a command center with buttons that control the robot like wriggling its fingers or opening its mouth. Charli sits at the command center while Punchline squeezes into the

motion-capture suit.

"Ready?" He asks.

"Ready!" Says Charli as she takes the controls.

As Punchline moves, so does the tilt-a-whirl robot. Back to the carnival they go, smashing everything in their way.

"The world is our oyster now, baby!!" Exclaims Punchline from the intercom of the robot to Charli.

Unbeknownst to the villains, Larry is following them aboard his Larry-

cycle.

"Gee, Alfred!" He exclaims on his comlink. "Amazing what you can make with an old lawnmower engine, car parts and a toothpick!"

"Well, invention is my specialty, master Larry."

Larry chuckles.

The cycle is rapidly approaching Punchline now, but with those giant robot legs he and Charli are

significantly closer to the carnival. Larry shoots out his plunger-ear,

which grips onto a building.

"Oh, honeypie!" Charli titters. "We got company!"

Punchline smiles.

The giant robot throws a punch,

Larryboy blocks it. He throws a few more kicks and punches, but Larry blocks them as well.

"You know, Larry," says Punchline as Charli begins to unleash the laughing gas. "We're not so different, you and I."

"Whad'ya mean?!" Says Larry. "I'm the good guy, you're not!"

The sun begins to rise in the

background. At this moment, the

citizens are now being exposed to

the gas, laughing uncontrollably.

Ambulances arrive and doctors take hundreds of people to the local hospital, even the Commish.

"Yes..." Punchline extends a robot hand and picks up Larry. "You're the

hero, the one they sing songs about and give praise to. Heck, you may as well be a Messiah. Of course. What you don't know, is that I was just like you; a kid whose down on his luck, a kid who had something taken away from him, for you, your guardians, for me, my wife and my sanity. We are so alike in ways we cannot even begin to comprehend. In other words, you complete me."

"What?!" Said Larry.

"Have you ever danced with the Devil in the pale moonlight?"

Larry's eyes widen as it dawns on him.

"...you." He starts. "YOUUU!!! YOU WERE THAT INSIGNIFICANT, LOW-DOWN FLEA THAT KILLED THEM!!"

Punchline grins and nods. Charli slowly moves to the back door,

grabbing her purse.

"...okay...just gonna leave you two to sort it out.." Charli jumps out the back door with Chuck and lands in a city drain pipe.

Larry shoots both plunger ears onto two buildings. He moves back a little, and launches himself at the robot, giving a loud war cry of "RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAWRGGH!".

The robot is flung back by the force of Larry, but Punchline quickly stands up and grasps Larry yet again.

"Ooh! Looky here--my very own Larryboy action figure!" The giant hand that now enclosed Larry

proceeds to make him zoom through the buildings, Punchline making childish explosion and

airplane noises.

Poor Larry feels the glass and rubble from the buildings seep into

his suit and cut his skin.

It seems as though it is the end, being tormented in this way.

But strangely, he begins to hear

voices.

"Such a good boy, Lawrence!"

"Well done, son!"

"Mom..." he thinks. "Dad..."

Then, he knows what he has to do.

On the arm, there was a really small, loose red wire. If that wire was pulled, it would unravel the main controls and break the entire thing down.

"...ah, SOME HERO YOU ARE!"

Punchline was still 'playing' with Larry.

Larry felt something in his suit pocket--it was the bottle of olive oil.

Larry squeezed the olive oil bottle,

splattering extra virgin all over his

sides. Being since he was now greased up, the cucumber broke free from Punchline's grasp and proceeded to run up the robotic arm.

"HEY! HEY WHAT'RE YOU DOIN'?!"

Exclaimed Punchline.

Larry attached the red wire to his plunger-ears and swung around the legs of the robot.

"...DID YOU EVER SEE THAT STAR

WARS MOVIE, RETURN OF THE

JEDI? YOU REMEMBER THAT PART WHERE LUKE WRAPS HIS TOW CABLE AROUND THAT BIG DOG-LOOKING ROBOT?!" Larry continued to wrap around the robot until all the other wires were exposed. Next, he fires one of his plungers directly at the core, the chain reaction causing the robot to

explode.

Punchline flew out the head,

screaming his head off, until he was caught in mid-air by Larry, beating him up as the two descended back

into the ground.

(*KA-BOOM!*)

There was a large crack where the two had fallen. Punchline got up,

completely beaten. Charli emerged

from the drain pipe and came to his aid.

"SIC EM', CHUCK!" She told her hyena.

Chuckles growled and barked. He ran at Larry, baring his teeth. With a single non-existent hand, Larry decked Chuck onto the pavement. The hyena got up and staggered over to Charli, whimpering.

"You.." Punchline gulped. "You

punched my hyena!"

"That's not the only thing I'm gonna punch..." Larry smiled. "...line."

(*BA-DUM-TSSS!*)

"Ahaha!" Laughed Charli. "Plunger-boy made a pun."


	10. Epilogue

The Stormtroopers bought Bob Solo to the enormous carbonite-freezing machine. The rest of the gang tried to get past the Stormtroopers, but it was of no avail. Just as Bob was about to be frozen, Leia strained and strained, until...

"I love you!" Said Leia.

"I know." Said Bob.

With his last breath, Bob was frozen in the carbonite. Leia and the gang watched in horror and sadness as their old friend was carried onto Boba Fett's ship, and sent away to Tatooine.

"Wonderful." Said Verdura. "That Hutt's gonna be stoked when he

sees this."

"Indeed, my Lord." Said an Imperial officer.

While Verdura and the officer chatted, Leia, Lando and Chewie slowly crept to the Falcon. Leia started the ignition and the Falcon zoomed into space before Verdura and his men could even look.

Meanwhile, Cuke Skywalker still

hung from the bottom of Cloud

City. While he was there, he pondered many strange things, such as the difference between living and life, or sleeping or dreaming.

"I guess the...VinaIgrETte will know..." Said Cuke, delirious.

Just then, Cuke saw something coming at him.

"I'm seeing things..." He thought.

"Yeah...things..."

What was coming closer to him was not a figment of his imagination. It was the Millenium Falcon!! Chewie growled and beeped the horn. The hatch opened, and Cuke was greeted by Leia.

"I GOT YOUR MESSAGE!!" Yelled Leia. "JUST LET GO AND YOU'LL BE SAFE!!!"

Cuke removed his metaphorical fingers from the ledge he was holding onto, and let himself fall into

the Falcon's hatch. Lando and Chewie grabbed Cuke and placed him on a couch. Leia grabbed the

Falcon's first-aid kit and started to treat Cuke's injuries while Chewie continued to repair Archie-p0.

"You just sit back and relax, little buddy." Said Lando. "We'll get you back in no time."

Cuke sat down on one of the Falcon's chairs. In front of him, there was a TV. He picked up a

remote lying on the space checkers table and turned it on.

"I love this show..."

Said Cuke.

'AND NOW IT'S TIME FOR...THE SOOOOOOUUULLLLLL...TRAAAAIIIINNNNN..."

Cuke had been dropped off on Dagobah with his X-wing in order to finish his training. Yoga handed him

something long, wrapped in fabric. Cuke opened it.

"A lightsaber?" He said, activating it, and watching the green flame.

"Your father's lightsaber, that is." Said Yoga.

Cuke stared at the lightsaber, and through the Lite Vinaigrette saw a vision of the past. It was his father, fighting for the Galaxy in the Clone Wars. He closed the lightsaber, and smiled, proudly. Cuke knew his destiny now.

With Bob Solo captured, the Rebellion was in the non-existent hands of Leia, Chewie, Cuke, R2 and Arch now. They would have to think of something fast, or watch everything and everyone die.

End...for now.


End file.
